


Happy as you are

by Cohkka (orphan_account)



Category: Stand Still Stay Silent
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 03:51:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3514328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Cohkka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The lake is quiet, and beautiful, and it makes Emil uncomfortable. </p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy as you are

When Emil discovers he has been into Lalli for a long while, he is decides to play it cool - but first he hits himself with a water canister. The canister is empty, but it is painful anyways and also makes a loud sound. He looks around to check if anybody noticed.  
There is Mikkel humming a song over the pot in the distance, there is Sigrun lying on the grass, flat on her stomach, chewing a pencil over a map. He cannot see Tuuri, but there are her boots sticking from under the tank, and he can hear her talking to Lalli - in a very cheerful tone for someone who has spent three days with a spanner trying to bring the thing back to life. And finally there is Lalli sitting on his haunches near Tuuri's feet and looking something between bored and lost. He takes a spare part from time to time, fiddles with it, then puts it back carefully and moves to another. He has a smudge of machine oil on his nose. Emil winces. He grabs the gun, the canister, and walks off to the lake, because it might be a good idea to be useful if you cannot be adequate.   
The lake is huge. It is all air and water, the shoreline is cut by huge black rocks, some of them in the water and some on the shore - just big enough to hide anything that may want to hide. The lake is quiet, and beautiful, and it makes Emil uncomfortable.   
The shore of has been checked and double checked over the course of three days and declared a safe place. It does not stop Emil from contemplating being eaten by a troll as he kicks the cones on the beach. It is one way to stop over-thinking, and right now the thought weirdly attractive. He sits down and stares at the water with bright rocks on the bottom, and does his best to switch to something trivial enough, or scary enough to get him distracted - and keeps failing. He curses, dips the canister, and next moment he knows he is being watched.   
Very slowly, he puts down the canister and fumbles for the gun on his back, then - very slowly again - he turns back, ready to smell a troll's stench at any moment. He sees Lalli sitting on a big rock instead, watching Emil's gun with the same expression as when he was watching Tuuri fixing the tank. Emil breathes out, slides down to sit on the ground, and locks the gun.  
"Damn, did anyone told you about sneaking at people like this? I thought it was a troll - you know, it does not sound so good now. I think I would rather deal with some embarrassment thank you very much…"  
Emil stumbles, because the way Lalli is staring at the water behind Emil's back instead of paying attention is irritating.   
"Sure, you do not understand me, but it is super silly, talking to you like this. You could at least pretend you are listening, you know?"  
Lalli blinks. Emil follows his gaze, and there is the canister floating away over the calm pink water. Emil curses and runs for the canister, and when he returns not only does he feel like an emotional wreck, but also his trousers are wet all way up to the knees. It is even worser now that Lalli is watching him with mild interest. Emil stomps the canister to the ground and drops down to sit near Lalli. They are silent for a while, Lalli holding his own knees and Emil first angry, than frustrated, then just trying to guess what is happening inside Lalli's head. Then Emil sighs.  
"Damn perfect. I know that you think I'm an idiot - you are right after all. You need to be an idiot to be mooning over someone like you… Not that there is anything wrong with you. It is just that you look quite happy as you are... Do you even care about such things? Are you... into people? Like, at all?"  
To his surprise, Lalli actually turns to him and replies - it is a short burst of Finnish, more words than Emil has ever heard him say, and when he finishes, he clearly waits for Emil to reply. Emil blinks and stares. The expression on Lalli's face turns something between tired and desperate. He repeats slower, now with gestures, this time there are some words that Emil remembers from the times when Lalli had reasons to be very upset with him, and then Emil is being kissed.   
It is nothing like a good kiss, because it is out of pace, it is quick, the angle is odd, and Emil forgets to close his eyes. It is awkward, because Emil's back is pushed into a rock with unexpected force, he does not know where to put his hands, and it takes him time to remember to breathe through the nose. But there are also two very strong thin hands on his shoulders, and Lalli is pressed so close, that Emil can feel the heat even through all the clothes, and all this is making his head sway. It is over before he even has a chance to respond. Lalli is crouching in front of him looking ruffled and serious. It takes Emil a few moments to breath in.  
"Well. You have made a point. Very clear. No questions whether you are interested or not."  
Lalli's expression does not change and his posture is like he is ready to jump up and go away at any second.  
"Normally, people do some talking at this point, but right, yes, no such luck."  
Emil reaches for Lalli's shoulders, pulls him close and kisses him back. It is even more awkward this time with the two of them acting at once, Emil trying to slow it down, and Lalli being all movement and quick licks, but Emil does not let go, and Lalli does not move away. It takes them a long time before the pace evens and they stop bumping their noses.   
It feels like a big success, and Emil is so happy with it that he does not notice straight away that Lalli is unzipping his collar. When he feels a nibble on his neck, he gasps and hopes he did not whine - or did not whine too loud. He does not have much time to reflect on it, because while Lalli is busy with his neck - flickers of teeth, lips, tongue - he is unzipping Lalli's jacket which is the most complicated piece of clothing he has ever dealt with.  
When Emil's hands get inside, Lalli stops and stiffens. There are a few panicking thoughts in Emil's head at once - whether his hands are cold, or he is not supposed to do anything like that yet, or whether Lalli just does not like being touched - but Lalli does not move away or protest. He breathes against Emil's shoulder for a while and then goes back up to kissing him - this time much slower and softer, but it hits Emil harder than being pushed against the rock. He moves his hands up under Lalli's sweater, and it is weird, because when he feels a heart racing so close to skin it makes his own heart clench. It is like he has to stop and take a breath, and at the same time he cannot stop at all, and he is not sure if it is okay to keep making out when you feel this way about someone, because it is not about making out, but it also is - and then Lalli stops.   
He pulls away and listens, with his face composed like when they are checking a new location. Before Emil decides whether he should grab a gun or just die because he has spoiled everything, Lalli turns back, kisses him quick on the jaw missing the mouth, and next moment Emil is alone on the shore.   
He tries to catch whatever Lalli has heard, but the only sound he hears is his own heavy breathing. So he straightens his clothes and hair as good as he can, still feeling light-headed, dizzy and so happy he cannot think straight. Stands up, listens again for a while, then he turns to go back to the camp and stumbles into Sigrun who is coming out of the forest.  
"Oh. Sigrun. Hi there. I was just out to bring some water," Emill mumbles, scolds himself for mumbling and hopes his face does not look too red.  
"Sure. That's very helpful of you!" Sigrun grins and walks to pick the canister that still standing by the rock. "It's just that dinner is about to be ready, and Mikkel is about to get very upset if you guys do not show up in time. You know where Lalli is, by any chance?"  
"No idea. He must be somewhere around. Like, in the forest. Not far. Maybe."  
"He'd better get back by dinner - or he will find an empty pot!" she says to the forest and then, before Emil can protest, lifts the canister to her shoulder. "You know there is a smudge on your nose, don't you?"

**Author's Note:**

> There is a trope that Lalli is an asexual. The trope is absolutely fine, and it fits Lalli well, because hey, he is not very excited about any kind of human interaction whatsoever, but I could not resist the challenge to look from a different angle.
> 
> And also, "Emil is overthinking, but manages to do things right" should be a tag.


End file.
